Prime Time Rivalry

for a long time i had remorse
over how often we argued

we argued a lot

sometimes about politics
but on those
we mostly agreed

sometimes about other family members
but on them
we mostly agreed

the majority of our debate
was over what to watch on the ol' boob-tube

"Everybody Loves Raymond
is trite garbage," i'd say
trying to sound smart

"well," she'd respond
"it's still better than that
dumb show you watch"
referring to The X-Files
or The Simpsons
or Futurama

we both liked Frasier and The Golden Girls
but beyond
we just could not find any common ground

so
after dinner we would go
to our separate rooms
and during commercial breaks
bother each other with details
from our rival episodes

both to reply with the same witty retort
"sounds stupid"

that was our thing

it wasn't that long ago
i stopped regretting it

and tonight
as i tried to watch a rerun of "Raymond"
i wished like hell she was still alive
so i could call her and tell her
what a dumb fuckin' show that is