Sad Song on Repeat
after a day surrounded by philistines
a not yet broken poet takes refuge
in the familiar peace of desolation
echoing quietly through two small speakers
years ago this song came to him
in the most serendipitous way
lost in a record store
lost in his changing taste of music
intirigued by its title
he purchased the album on a whim
when he got it home
to his roach infested efficiency apartment
it proved itself the perfect companion piece
to the cheap bottles of scotch he'd grown fond of
most of the tracks were laced with enough angst
to keep his punk spirit burning
yet calm enough to sense something
he'd been waiting for
was somewhere
on this album
and then it played
track 17
at first
he couldn't believe he'd found it
the song he'd been waiting a lifetime for
but upon a few more listens he came to realize
it had found him
duetting vocals literally sang his name
in a tale of woe
and misguided love
against strings picked softly
in the warmth of a minor key
it comforted him
it said
"if you never have anything else
you have me"
years later
it tells him the same
-for "Everything's Bad" by The Tossers
Saturday, February 28, 2015
Friday, February 27, 2015
The Last Day of February
Winter will not go with a whisper
but its last scream is near
an Iowan stares out the window
at a backyard covered in snow
patiently
awaiting Spring
roads that are clear for bicycle rides
green parks that welcome a lie in the grass
layers left at home
a folded scarf
placed on a shelf in the closet
with gloves and wool cap
he knows March will not be a picnic
that this blanket of white will not vanish
tomorrow
but
soon
warm days may not be here
but they are close
and sometimes
close is enough
Winter will not go with a whisper
but its last scream is near
Winter will not go with a whisper
but its last scream is near
an Iowan stares out the window
at a backyard covered in snow
patiently
awaiting Spring
roads that are clear for bicycle rides
green parks that welcome a lie in the grass
layers left at home
a folded scarf
placed on a shelf in the closet
with gloves and wool cap
he knows March will not be a picnic
that this blanket of white will not vanish
tomorrow
but
soon
warm days may not be here
but they are close
and sometimes
close is enough
Winter will not go with a whisper
but its last scream is near
Halo of Flies
Pat's dad drove us to Minneapolis
to see a rock legend on stage
we listened to a tape i made
of some favorites
i pointed out one song
proclaiming in my cockiness
"i know they won't play this one!"
we banged our heads on the highway
letting the excitement build up
until it we were boiled over
with the energy of youth
getting to the arena early
we clasped ourselves to the fence
front row
we endured through three awful opening acts
and finally
Alice took the stage
a worship far more vital than for God
swept through the hall
and we were among true brethren
screamed until we could not speak tomorrow
listened until we could not hear
and i was even forced to eat my words
when the band started playing that deep cut
ultimately
the concert ended
the arena emptied
and we both grew up
i haven't spoken to Pat in sixteen years
and that happens
people in different directions
but i always think of him
when i listen to track three on
Killer
Pat's dad drove us to Minneapolis
to see a rock legend on stage
we listened to a tape i made
of some favorites
i pointed out one song
proclaiming in my cockiness
"i know they won't play this one!"
we banged our heads on the highway
letting the excitement build up
until it we were boiled over
with the energy of youth
getting to the arena early
we clasped ourselves to the fence
front row
we endured through three awful opening acts
and finally
Alice took the stage
a worship far more vital than for God
swept through the hall
and we were among true brethren
screamed until we could not speak tomorrow
listened until we could not hear
and i was even forced to eat my words
when the band started playing that deep cut
ultimately
the concert ended
the arena emptied
and we both grew up
i haven't spoken to Pat in sixteen years
and that happens
people in different directions
but i always think of him
when i listen to track three on
Killer
Wednesday, February 25, 2015
Monday, February 23, 2015
You're A Suit
tailored finely to be worn proudly
on the dance floor
on the moon
over top-shelf martinis
over the rainbow
in the office
or anywhere
meant to be seen
strutted with esteem
down the daily runway
a high standard of fashion
bulletproof to criticism
strong threads
from collar to cuffs
belt to hem
too beautiful for the closet
tailored finely to be worn proudly
on the dance floor
on the moon
over top-shelf martinis
over the rainbow
in the office
or anywhere
meant to be seen
strutted with esteem
down the daily runway
a high standard of fashion
bulletproof to criticism
strong threads
from collar to cuffs
belt to hem
too beautiful for the closet
A Letter From Yesterday
i know that you miss me
we were happy together
and i don't ever want you to
forget
i want to always be there
as a warm place in your mind
a loving place in your heart
but
i also want you to move forward
seizing the day that is in your arms
ready for each that follows
what we had was wonderful
a moment in time that should echo
in the deepest parts of your soul
and help to excite you
for what comes next
i know you miss me
but tomorrow
needs you more than i ever could
i know that you miss me
we were happy together
and i don't ever want you to
forget
i want to always be there
as a warm place in your mind
a loving place in your heart
but
i also want you to move forward
seizing the day that is in your arms
ready for each that follows
what we had was wonderful
a moment in time that should echo
in the deepest parts of your soul
and help to excite you
for what comes next
i know you miss me
but tomorrow
needs you more than i ever could
A Letter From Tomorrow
i know that today was not
what you wanted it to be
a job that left you
feeling empty and aggravated
a lover that left you alone
with a memory that
will take time to shake
i know that what you want
right now
is just to crawl into bed
fall asleep to the t.v.
and spend the next twenty-four hours
unconscious
in a state of slumber
you don't want to wake up in the morning
having to face another day like today
i promise
you won't
i
will be
different
i cannot guarantee you will be happy
with all i have to give
but you have my word
that it will not be the same
so before you hit the snooze button
come dawn
know that i will be waiting for you
and i am as much yours
as i am anyone else's
i know that today was not
what you wanted it to be
a job that left you
feeling empty and aggravated
a lover that left you alone
with a memory that
will take time to shake
i know that what you want
right now
is just to crawl into bed
fall asleep to the t.v.
and spend the next twenty-four hours
unconscious
in a state of slumber
you don't want to wake up in the morning
having to face another day like today
i promise
you won't
i
will be
different
i cannot guarantee you will be happy
with all i have to give
but you have my word
that it will not be the same
so before you hit the snooze button
come dawn
know that i will be waiting for you
and i am as much yours
as i am anyone else's
Sunday, February 22, 2015
Saturday, February 21, 2015
Friday, February 20, 2015
Relativity
do not weep when the bird flies away
from your window sill
be grateful that it ever landed there
even if just for
a moment
that you were there
to witness its brief song
that your eyes took fortune
in the glowing light of its feathers
and know
that when it flies away
there are infinite avenues in this universe
and just because you are still here
and it is not
does not mean
it is
gone
do not weep when the bird flies away
from your window sill
be grateful that it ever landed there
even if just for
a moment
that you were there
to witness its brief song
that your eyes took fortune
in the glowing light of its feathers
and know
that when it flies away
there are infinite avenues in this universe
and just because you are still here
and it is not
does not mean
it is
gone
Wednesday, February 18, 2015
Day Trip
Riding to Des Moines
with Uncle Dan.
He's got cards to play;
I've got apartments to scope.
We talk about women.
He wonders if that tall drink of water,
met over sushi yesterday,
is thinking about him as much as
he's thinking about her.
We argue semantics.
"You don't
know,"
he exclaims,
"you assume!"
No pit stops,
bathroom breaks,
or dilly-dallyin'.
He's gotta be there by 11:15
if he wants to get in the game.
Checking the time,
he picks up speed;
racing the GPS.
"30 minutes, my ass.
I'll have us there
25!"
Riding to Des Moines
with Uncle Dan.
He's got cards to play;
I've got apartments to scope.
We talk about women.
He wonders if that tall drink of water,
met over sushi yesterday,
is thinking about him as much as
he's thinking about her.
We argue semantics.
"You don't
know,"
he exclaims,
"you assume!"
No pit stops,
bathroom breaks,
or dilly-dallyin'.
He's gotta be there by 11:15
if he wants to get in the game.
Checking the time,
he picks up speed;
racing the GPS.
"30 minutes, my ass.
I'll have us there
25!"
Gentrification
i followed the pigeons
to Gordon park
just to hear them coo
their electric feathers alive
in the sun
sparkled like bejeweled jackets
heads dancing to a song i
could not hear
at first
but when i listened closer
it came bursting
orchestrally loud
suddenly there was music
spilling from the tree branches
winds serenading through bushes
for a brief moment the park sang to us
belonged to us
me and the pigeons
until the seagulls came
and chased us
away
i followed the pigeons
to Gordon park
just to hear them coo
their electric feathers alive
in the sun
sparkled like bejeweled jackets
heads dancing to a song i
could not hear
at first
but when i listened closer
it came bursting
orchestrally loud
suddenly there was music
spilling from the tree branches
winds serenading through bushes
for a brief moment the park sang to us
belonged to us
me and the pigeons
until the seagulls came
and chased us
away
Lemmy After Death
i don't ever want to rest in peace
and i certainly don't want any of my friends
resting in peace
some of us grew up listening to punk rock
and speed metal
but most of us just never grew up
we weren't afraid of aging
we sure as shit weren't afraid of dying
we were scared of getting old
kept our stereos cranked
trying to shake the angels out of heaven
let the gods know that we weren't laying down
that we would keep it loud while we were still here
on this earth
and after
so when death comes knocking
he better have a goddamn Motorhead record
-for Daniel Cline
i don't ever want to rest in peace
and i certainly don't want any of my friends
resting in peace
some of us grew up listening to punk rock
and speed metal
but most of us just never grew up
we weren't afraid of aging
we sure as shit weren't afraid of dying
we were scared of getting old
kept our stereos cranked
trying to shake the angels out of heaven
let the gods know that we weren't laying down
that we would keep it loud while we were still here
on this earth
and after
so when death comes knocking
he better have a goddamn Motorhead record
-for Daniel Cline
Est. 1974
i'm writing this to you
my friend
because the last time i said goodbye
it was passive
i thought for sure
we would be sharing drinks again
i took it for granted
i shouldn't have
i get along with most people
but that is not to say i like them
i liked you
loved you
you were a brother soon after we met
maybe even right away
i remember your first words to me
seeing me eye each woman that walked in the bar
you said
"man, you are huntin' for pussy tonight"
you knew me too well
your humor was apparent
immediately
so was your love for metal
in that Obituary - Cause of Death shirt
a knowledge of food
as impressive as knowledge of music
and what i liked most
more than the laughs
more than the drinks
is when it was just you and me
bellied up to that bar
truly talking to each other
truly listening
so i just wanted to say thanks again
not just for the laughs
not just for the drinks
not just for the help with jobs
not just for being a friend
but for being an original
there's never been enough of those
and now there's one less
-for Daniel Cline
i'm writing this to you
my friend
because the last time i said goodbye
it was passive
i thought for sure
we would be sharing drinks again
i took it for granted
i shouldn't have
i get along with most people
but that is not to say i like them
i liked you
loved you
you were a brother soon after we met
maybe even right away
i remember your first words to me
seeing me eye each woman that walked in the bar
you said
"man, you are huntin' for pussy tonight"
you knew me too well
your humor was apparent
immediately
so was your love for metal
in that Obituary - Cause of Death shirt
a knowledge of food
as impressive as knowledge of music
and what i liked most
more than the laughs
more than the drinks
is when it was just you and me
bellied up to that bar
truly talking to each other
truly listening
so i just wanted to say thanks again
not just for the laughs
not just for the drinks
not just for the help with jobs
not just for being a friend
but for being an original
there's never been enough of those
and now there's one less
-for Daniel Cline
Monday, February 16, 2015
The Corpse That Got Away
granted only one night
to rise from her grave
we lived in each second
with the cherish of eternity
in the brief moments we had
she shared her death with me
and i
my life with her
to the quiet music of decay
she allowed me to lead
but when she left
left me alone
in the cemetery
granted only one night
to rise from her grave
we lived in each second
with the cherish of eternity
in the brief moments we had
she shared her death with me
and i
my life with her
to the quiet music of decay
she allowed me to lead
but when she left
left me alone
in the cemetery
Birthday
i didn't call her
because i felt like being alone
and celebratory sex wasn't going to be enough
to validate another year of suffering myself
another notch in the belt
just makes me think twice
about the next piece of cake
another revolution around the sun
and i just wish the sun would go away
wish the sky would stay dark
wish the moon was always there
wish i never had to miss the stars
but
if i was that serious about it
i probably would've bought some candles
i didn't call her
because i felt like being alone
and celebratory sex wasn't going to be enough
to validate another year of suffering myself
another notch in the belt
just makes me think twice
about the next piece of cake
another revolution around the sun
and i just wish the sun would go away
wish the sky would stay dark
wish the moon was always there
wish i never had to miss the stars
but
if i was that serious about it
i probably would've bought some candles
Fruit Vendors (Matters Of Trust)
a man with a cart of oranges on the side of the road
sells them with acclaim for their juice
sweet citrus that excites the tongue
for a moment of pleasure
i trustingly pay him with change from my pocket
and at first bite i know
that the product
lives up to his claims
another man in a room with his name on the door
framed papers verifying his
knowledge of all things fruit
sells blends of various concentrates
perfected recipes of long study
he attests will sweeten the very day
sharpen the ordinary mind
in marvelous ways
i decide not to buy
having not the means in my pocket
and an overwhelming suspicion that
he is full of shit
Don't Leave The Monster Unattended
how quickly my wits left me
in the chaotic hyperbole of a Saturday night
whiskey and weed were not enough
those every night adventures had grown trivial
and this was a night that called for something
special
phone calls were dialed to shady contacts
eleventh hour appointments were made
congress of the underbelly
girls like ravaged angels
danced barefoot on shag carpet
lines reminded me of Houdini
disappearing as they hit the glass
at dawn
i took one of heaven's broken creatures
back to my place
we made god cry
then cried for ourselves
knowing that a night that should have never began
was far from over
how quickly my wits left me
in the chaotic hyperbole of a Saturday night
whiskey and weed were not enough
those every night adventures had grown trivial
and this was a night that called for something
special
phone calls were dialed to shady contacts
eleventh hour appointments were made
congress of the underbelly
girls like ravaged angels
danced barefoot on shag carpet
lines reminded me of Houdini
disappearing as they hit the glass
at dawn
i took one of heaven's broken creatures
back to my place
we made god cry
then cried for ourselves
knowing that a night that should have never began
was far from over
Saturday, February 14, 2015
Friday, February 13, 2015
Serpent Or The Egg
coiled in a moment of wonder
to ponder the venom of his existence
remembering every instance
that he prepared himself to strike
with no recollection of hatching
how it came to be this way remained
a question
nature versus nurture?
soul versus environment?
surviving the jungle
leaves little time to find the answer
as to what came first
Evil
her neck
wilted petals of a rose
once preciously red
had dried
grayed
and began
to resemble death
instead of love
what was meant to represent beauty
once preciously red
had dried
grayed
and began
to resemble death
instead of love
what was meant to represent beauty
shriveled into hideous decay
in the last days of their relationship
lips that tasted sweet
became sour
became sour
passion that was
at first
exciting
became poison
at first
exciting
became poison
her neck
which he'd pecked
with so many soft kisses
with so many soft kisses
seemed as if
it was daring his hands
it was daring his hands
to be clutched
until there was nothing
until there was nothing
left in her eyes
ultimately
he did not
and she never realized
how close she was
how close she was
Thursday, February 12, 2015
The Slip
going out for Golden Gloves
when i was a teenager
i trained as hard as anyone
paid close attention to the science
my coach
Ronnie Walstrom
taught me
when it came time to spar with the other guys
i could never get inside
never land a punch
but i could slip
at one point
Ronnie even said
"that's some of the best slipping i've seen,
but you're arms are too short to connect, buddy"
i've applied that same mentality to the rest of my life
and instead of ever trying to win
instead of going for the knockout
i just make sure to
get out of the way
going out for Golden Gloves
when i was a teenager
i trained as hard as anyone
paid close attention to the science
my coach
Ronnie Walstrom
taught me
when it came time to spar with the other guys
i could never get inside
never land a punch
but i could slip
at one point
Ronnie even said
"that's some of the best slipping i've seen,
but you're arms are too short to connect, buddy"
i've applied that same mentality to the rest of my life
and instead of ever trying to win
instead of going for the knockout
i just make sure to
get out of the way
Wednesday, February 11, 2015
Covet Of The Morning Star
lit with cigarettes and neon
we edged ourselves closer
to the end of our stools
to the end of our drinks
to the end of each other
vodka tasted like heartbreak
bitter and familiar on the tongue
something we were both used to
her eyes ciphered cryptic messages
as if she was summoning fallen angels
and sure enough
i fell from grace
into her devilish caress
My Knee
my knee is there
if i need to bend my leg
my knee is not there
for me to beg
if you place an empty plate in front of me
i will feed off of my own integrity
i'll go hungry
i'm not looking for charity
i just want to see an end to disparity
so you can take my food
but you can't take my verity
cause the truth is what keeps my soul fed
but i bet you keep on lying 'til we're both dead
i even think you fall for the lies you tell
buy into the shit you sell
deceive yourself to believe yourself
and get fed well
your kitchen and my kitchen will never compare
your cupboards are full of fare
when my cupboards are bare
but i am never going to ask you for what you can spare
cause i don't want
your peanut butter
and i don't want
your jelly
i just want the opportunity
to bake my own bread
and fill my own belly
my knee is there
if i need to bend my leg
my knee is not there
for me to beg
my knee is there
if i need to bend my leg
my knee is not there
for me to beg
if you place an empty plate in front of me
i will feed off of my own integrity
i'll go hungry
i'm not looking for charity
i just want to see an end to disparity
so you can take my food
but you can't take my verity
cause the truth is what keeps my soul fed
but i bet you keep on lying 'til we're both dead
i even think you fall for the lies you tell
buy into the shit you sell
deceive yourself to believe yourself
and get fed well
your kitchen and my kitchen will never compare
your cupboards are full of fare
when my cupboards are bare
but i am never going to ask you for what you can spare
cause i don't want
your peanut butter
and i don't want
your jelly
i just want the opportunity
to bake my own bread
and fill my own belly
my knee is there
if i need to bend my leg
my knee is not there
for me to beg
Tuesday, February 10, 2015
He Knows What Love Is (And It's Ugly)
looking over the backs of his hands
observing blemished knuckles
scars from punching walls
and refrigerator doors
recollections of vituperative outbursts
come flooding back
when jealous fits of rage
overwhelmed the room
intended to frighten another
into being controlled
all in the name of love
always the culprit
always the muse
looking over the backs of his hands
observing blemished knuckles
scars from punching walls
and refrigerator doors
recollections of vituperative outbursts
come flooding back
when jealous fits of rage
overwhelmed the room
intended to frighten another
into being controlled
all in the name of love
always the culprit
always the muse
Monday, February 9, 2015
Sunday, February 8, 2015
Saturday, February 7, 2015
Magic
human beings are animals
and we should
absolutely
celebrate that
when we are hungry
to enjoy a good meal
when we are horny
to enjoy good sex
or okay sex
or any sex
when we are thirsty
to drink
when we are angry
to yell like savages at the top of our lungs
but we should never forget the magic in us
that we are equipped with almost supernatural imaginations
that allow us to create beautiful paintings
write wonderful stories
sing
and play instruments
generating melodies that speak deeply to our emotions
we should marvel in the reality that we are more than
what we eat
who we fuck
carbon based bodies
approximately 57% water
and with this
i intend no disregard for the glamour
of other beasts on this planet
loyalty of the dog
agility of the cat
flight of the bird
and even the tenacity of the cockroach
they all have their own magic
as well
but we
in all the complexities of our minds
or souls
if you are one to call it that
should never cease to overlook our potential
to be truly remarkable
human beings are animals
and we should
absolutely
celebrate that
when we are hungry
to enjoy a good meal
when we are horny
to enjoy good sex
or okay sex
or any sex
when we are thirsty
to drink
when we are angry
to yell like savages at the top of our lungs
but we should never forget the magic in us
that we are equipped with almost supernatural imaginations
that allow us to create beautiful paintings
write wonderful stories
sing
and play instruments
generating melodies that speak deeply to our emotions
we should marvel in the reality that we are more than
what we eat
who we fuck
carbon based bodies
approximately 57% water
and with this
i intend no disregard for the glamour
of other beasts on this planet
loyalty of the dog
agility of the cat
flight of the bird
and even the tenacity of the cockroach
they all have their own magic
as well
but we
in all the complexities of our minds
or souls
if you are one to call it that
should never cease to overlook our potential
to be truly remarkable
My Rose
put a million miles between me and my rose
shoes worn away from the journey
i will arrive with toes calloused
feet stained in earth
and legs swollen
between me and my rose
you can light a thousand fires
and i will look upon the petals with eyes black from ash
touch the thorns with fingertips of melted skin
breath deep its floral fragrance
through nostrils clouded in smoke
stand a hundred soldiers between me and my rose
and from a man of pacifism will rise
the fight of endless armies
awakened warrior with fists
clenched tightly
jaw
clenched tightly
and a heart like a tank
that will plow over whatever
stands in the way
put a million miles between me and my rose
shoes worn away from the journey
i will arrive with toes calloused
feet stained in earth
and legs swollen
between me and my rose
you can light a thousand fires
and i will look upon the petals with eyes black from ash
touch the thorns with fingertips of melted skin
breath deep its floral fragrance
through nostrils clouded in smoke
stand a hundred soldiers between me and my rose
and from a man of pacifism will rise
the fight of endless armies
awakened warrior with fists
clenched tightly
jaw
clenched tightly
and a heart like a tank
that will plow over whatever
stands in the way
Friday, February 6, 2015
Wednesday, February 4, 2015
Load In/Load Out
into another corner bar they go
climbing stairs covered in clumps of snow and ice
praying they don't slip carrying stacks of drums
hundreds of pounds of amplification
they set up in the corner
keeping a path clear
so that people can still get
to the bathroom while they play
untangling mic chords
untangling guitar cables
setting levels on the p.a.
tuning up
all in the hope that people will show
and listen
and maybe sing along
and maybe care
but even if no one does
they'll wrap the chords back up
stack the drums in a pile by the door
grab the hundreds of pounds of amplification
and load everything out
down the same set of snow and ice covered stairs
into another corner bar they go
climbing stairs covered in clumps of snow and ice
praying they don't slip carrying stacks of drums
hundreds of pounds of amplification
they set up in the corner
keeping a path clear
so that people can still get
to the bathroom while they play
untangling mic chords
untangling guitar cables
setting levels on the p.a.
tuning up
all in the hope that people will show
and listen
and maybe sing along
and maybe care
but even if no one does
they'll wrap the chords back up
stack the drums in a pile by the door
grab the hundreds of pounds of amplification
and load everything out
down the same set of snow and ice covered stairs
Tuesday, February 3, 2015
Monday, February 2, 2015
This Song Is Wanted For Murder
it opens with a violin
slowly bowing its premeditated plot
stalker lurking in darkness
waiting for a victim to stroll by
the verse comes out quick
a guitar strung to kill
impatient accomplice
along for the bloody ride
just looking for a thrill
and finally
the chorus
mastermind of homicidal harmony
bares a barbarous smile and stabs deep into the heart
multiple times
until the listener is left
dead
in his tracks
slowly bowing its premeditated plot
stalker lurking in darkness
waiting for a victim to stroll by
the verse comes out quick
a guitar strung to kill
impatient accomplice
along for the bloody ride
just looking for a thrill
and finally
the chorus
mastermind of homicidal harmony
bares a barbarous smile and stabs deep into the heart
multiple times
until the listener is left
dead
in his tracks
Sunday, February 1, 2015
28 Days of Purification
a man can be no more ready for February
than he is for his own death
bringing in the second wave of winter's strike
icy flakes whipping in the wind
relentlessly low temperature
shortest month of the year
but you wouldn't know it to take a walk in it
to brave its breath upon your cheeks
it comes on with the bravado of a thousand Januaries
a small dog with the teeth of a wolf
not to be understated
just when you wished the season was ending
it leaps back to into bitter action
with shivering esteem
a man can be no more ready for February
than he is for his own death
a man can be no more ready for February
than he is for his own death
bringing in the second wave of winter's strike
icy flakes whipping in the wind
relentlessly low temperature
shortest month of the year
but you wouldn't know it to take a walk in it
to brave its breath upon your cheeks
it comes on with the bravado of a thousand Januaries
a small dog with the teeth of a wolf
not to be understated
just when you wished the season was ending
it leaps back to into bitter action
with shivering esteem
a man can be no more ready for February
than he is for his own death
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